Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

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Wife: "I suggest you check properly next time you lose your keys so that you find them quicker" Husband: "I suggest that next time I sit down and have a beer while I wait for Doc Martin and his time machine to give my keys back.

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Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

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-what does burglars afraid of? -cancer.

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What is Yellow and American? A yellow american

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Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

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What is the Hardest part of helping a grandma who has having trouble crossing the road? Picking the gravel out of the wrinkles in her knees.

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Why did the kid want to do his science test? He didnt, who would want to do a science test...

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whos district champs not JM

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How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

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What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Knock Knock. GO AWAY!

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Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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Whats the best things about 25 year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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Why did the small 12 year old run away which a chicken. He felt like it and he was carrying bread which the chicken was allergic to.

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how does cody get laid? he doesnt.

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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