knock,knock you suck

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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Two elephants were out flying. Then one elephant said to the other: My grandmother has a pink toothbrush!

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What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

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Knock knock. Who is their? Grammar. Grammar who? Of course you don't know.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

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yo mama so stupid i'm fairly certain she has a learning disability.

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Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

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A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

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You wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment. Just kidding, women are actually a very valued part of our society. Just kidding again.

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If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

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Shea's sty....

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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whats worse than the holocaust ? ms.brinkmann? noo close....a black guy trying toget a job.

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What happened when the black woman moved to the front of the bus? There were no seats available but everyone was very nice about it. She also asked for gum. Somebody did have gum. Which was nice.

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Want to hear an anti-joke? Yes. Well I'm not going to tell you one.

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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A paralyzed guy walks into a bar... Oh wait, he can't.

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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