How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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What do you call 10 old black people in a barn? Used farm equipment

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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What does a white man say when you slug him in the face with a club. Ow.

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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Why can't Chuck Norris die? He can, he's just a normal human being.

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why did it take the black man 1.5 hours to get out of a movie theater? he wanted to patiently wait for the movie to end.

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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What did the fat girl use on Wii Fit? Cheat Codes.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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What has four legs, but cannot walk? A giraffe with polio.

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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Knock knock Shut up

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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What's worse than public speaking? Public masterbation. *Spelled it wrong purposly to bypass the filter*

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Q: Why can't dinosaurs talk? A: Because they're all dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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