HOLY SHIT, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Your mom is such a slut that your dad didn't even ask her if you were his biological child and raised you as if you were, regardless of what the dna results may suggest.

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A fat cat sits on the ground staring up at a fence. The fence stares down at the cat and laughs.

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An Icelandic boy hangs himself because of peer pressure. His family mourns for their loss

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bill goes to the room.. why? to fing a broom riddle boz full of burtiouse.

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A one armed blond is in a tree, how to you get her to come down? You wave to her?

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what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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Q:Why did Hitler lose World War II? A:His "gas" bill.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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When life gives you lemons, you should be wondering how "life" managed to give you those lemons.

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Chuck Norris doesn't drive a car. He tells the car where to go!

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Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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What's worst than missing a doctors appointment? Having AIDS and missng out on getting a cure that could have gotten rid of your disease.

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Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

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Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 had a gun.

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Yo Momma so fat, that she need the atlantic to take a bath!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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