A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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What sits in the corner of room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? • • • Stubbing your toe.

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What's the difference between a Lamborgini and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Lambo in my garage.

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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Irish sobriety

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Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

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Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

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how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

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DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC HAMSTER

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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sweating like antoni with a girl

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops