What did the man say when he saw a giant herd of elephants coming? "Look! There's a giant herd of elephants coming!"

Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

UN

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

Your mom is so old she died

I once did __________ (went to Hawaii, drank a whole gallon of beer, etc. ), but then I woke up. Works with anything, and people will laugh.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

What did the hand say to the face? Nothing because body parts cannot speak.

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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