What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

Why did the carrot jumped over the fence? It didn't. Carrots do not have the physical ability to jump.

how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She didn't. Despite losing her arms in a terrible accident as a child, Suzy persevered to become a renowned gymnast. After several turns as a champion Special Olympian, Suzy retired from sports in order to tour elementary schools as a guest speaker. She inspired thousands of disabled children across North America and was a highly-respected orator. Suzy sadly passed away in 2009 at the age of 62. She is survived by her two lovely daughters, Karen and Michelle.

Whats the difference in car and a bicycle? One has an engine and drivetrain designed to run on gas and the other is powered by your output of work

There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

Is Charlie Sheen bi-polar? Yes.

Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

How do you stop a baby from crawling in cirlcles? nail its hand to the floor

What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

National security?

what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

Whiney the poo and the blustery day.

So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

What? Why?

Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

why do you throw the baby up the tree??. to get my ball back.

Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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