i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

Knock Knock The doors already open

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead How did the second koala fall out of the tree? it was hit by the first one how did the third koala fall out of the tree? it thought it was a game and jumped off

Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

A blind Man walks into a Bar. A young man quickly runs over to him and helps him up.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

Whats the similarity between a rabbit and a grape? There both purple, except for the rabbit.

an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

what is blue and fuzzy? Blue Fuzz

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

An aspiring lawyer walks into a Bar. He will find out if he passed in a few months.

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

What is green fuzzy and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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