My lady, that is the backside of trust, I have decided to trust you, how am I supposed to feel about the fact that I believe to the point where I know that you mean everything you are saying? And that if you had any interest in backstabbing me, I would be risking my life, wife and friends. Do you not get trust? If you keep thinking like that, tomorrow you could be suspecting the mailman for being a spy, I can, and could tell you that I will cut ties with my employees, but then I would have you not only to believe me, but to support me financially, I do not need much, in fact, I need you to trust me, and if you do not trust me, what does it matter if I quit? You could accuse me for typing books that alter the mind (all books do), you could accuse me of having killed Nero and taken over... The point is, if you cannot trust me, then I cannot help you with what you ask, and if that is a requirement for our friendship to persist, then you are not looking for a friend, but for a employee.

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Hey i heard You were a wierd kid ooooooooooalskdfjaslkdfj

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3 like an eel

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In 1843 when Man invented the moon, people set sail on ironclad ships to lands that sold items that weren't for sale in similar such stores in other lands not reachable by ironclad ships or dirigibles as they became known once they changed form completely and were a differentobject entirely and of no use for water transport. That's when the real revolution in telecommunications began, the truck drivers would use CB radios as early as 1287 and 1276 in Canada. the CB radio enabled the users to order pizza and develop symbiotic relationshiops with canvas. Amongst other things.

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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Your life

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Knock-Knock Who's there? We are, now open the door! Wait im masturbating!!

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

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What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

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My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

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What do a black lesbian, Adolf Hitler and Jesus have in common? They are all the subject of this question.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse responds "I have cancer"

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Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

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Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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DID YOU HEAR THE FBI INVENTED A TELEPHONE THAT THEY CAN USE TO CALL THE DINOSAURS? ITS TRUE! Them DAMN DINOS REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR CELLPHONES THOUGH! Nero: This is not completely accurate though, a T-Rex called us twice actually, but he just kept roaring, making communication impossible... ...That sad moment when you post a totally non ofensive joke, then to tell you that I might your father, me or one of the sixthy guys that bukkaked your mother which was sucking off a dog and... Anyway problem solved!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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