Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting owl Interrupting owl- HOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

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The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

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Dakota Fanning

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Why did Little Suzie fall off her bike? I hit her with a shovel. Why did little Suzie die? I hit her with a shovel and she fell off her bike.

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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What is black and goes blub-blub? A black blub-blub. Good job. What is red and goes blub-blub? There is no such thing as a red blub-blub, you idiot.

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A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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When life gives you lemons you mix them with vinegar to make a drink that will help your high blood pressure.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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So a guy with a machine gun walks into a bank, makes a deposite and leaves.

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Knock Knock The doors already open

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Your mom is so stupid she has trouble holding a steady job and struggles to support her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops