What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

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How do you annoy a farmer? Shoot his wife.

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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What is the only day of the year when you're guaranteed to find me? The day I kill you.

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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Poop

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If youre African, why are you white?

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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A. What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew: B. Pizza's don't scream when you put them into a oven.

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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What is the anwer to life? (>^v^ )> KIRBY DANCE

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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whats worse than forgetting your lunch at home? getting diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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knock knok whos there? Jacob Jacob who? U know, your friend!

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What's the difference between a baby and an onion? One is a vegetable and the other is a human being.

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whats better than a girl getting hit by a car? a girl getting hit by a car with my dick in her

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops