Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why do migets laught when they run? Because the grass tickles their balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a cat that growls? A cat

thumb_up thumb_down -13

this joke is funny so dont read the rest even though there is no rest

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

thumb_up thumb_down -13

8 muslims walk into a bar You know why. Because their suicidal bombing plans were put off until Tuesday

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

thumb_up thumb_down -13

You have friends

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops