What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the 80 year old man do to celebrate valentines day with his wife? Nothing, Alzheimer's made him forget about Valentines day.....and that he was married. What did his wife do for Valentines day? Killed herself.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the kid raise his hand in class because he had a question

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did the soccer player say when he missed a penalty? damnit.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock. Who's There? A Banana. The middle aged man opened the door, prepared to distribute candy to the trick or treaters.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many dead kids can you fit into a plastic bag in your trunk? Ask Kasey Anthony

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why doesnt your dad like barrack Obama? because your dad is straight, hes not into men

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why isn't this joke funny? Because it has no point.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

North Korea is red. Amerika is blue. But they both split blood. All over you

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I personally really do not know

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You know what is totally sick? A person with stage II cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: What is sad about 4 people in a Cadillac driving over a cliff? A: You could have fit more.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the little girl who lost her baby teeth want for Christmas? A pony.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

This is Mr.Bear you all are on rtc for the next week. See me in G7 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's invisible and smells like carrots ? Rabbit Farts

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops