What did the boy reading a book do? He finished the book and took it back to library.

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timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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Cole and his brother josh tag team jaycie until she cries herself to sleep while Sarah watches

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What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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How do you stay out of Heaven? you stay alive.

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Doctor doctor, i think i need glasses! Go to an opticians then...

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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Get Outta Here We're Closed!

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what do u call a guy with 4 nipples? Hairy Styles

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" asks the bartender. "I'm a horse, it's genetic." replied the horse, confused at the bartender's infantile understanding of evolution and other species.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

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What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

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White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops