A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

What do you get when you cross an African, a white person, an Asian and a Spaniard? Society's worst nightmare

What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

Richard Gere has a girlfriend called Goldie

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a tape worm in your apple.

What did the fish say after he

Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

Why did Moses cross the road? He wanted to play Xbox with his friend Jeff. Moses was a 12 year old boy from California.

just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

Why isn't Abraham Lincoln on Mount Rushmore? Because he doesn't have a helicopter and he's dead.

Why did the black man run out of the shop with items under his jacket? He was shopping for groceries, when his brother texted him, letting him know that his wife had just gone into labour. He then realised that it was a very miserable rainy day outside and he didn't have an umbarella, so he payed for his items, and ran to his car.

800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

Crime doesn't pay. Sure it does

A black man walks into a bar. He sits down and has a couple drinks. When he is finished, he generously tips the bartender and walks out.

what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

Q: How did the black man get to the first branch on the tree? A: He climbed, like the average person.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

Person 1- Ask me if I am a tree Person 2- Ok, are you a tree? Person 1- Nope

whats worse than bitting into ur apple and finding a worm? bitting into ur apple an finding out u have just murded noddy and his family who were making a nice little home in there

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

lol i'm going to hell for laughing at this shit

. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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