Knock Knock Who's there? Kevin. Kevin who? Kevin Smith. Oh yes, Kevin Smith that lovely boy from just around the corner! Come on in!

A black man, a white man, and an Asian man walk into a bar. The black man says, "My wife died in a terrible book-keeping accident.". The white man says, "My wife died in a terrible lightbulb-sorting accident.". The Asian says, "My wife died in a terrible geography accident.". Soon after, the bar was hit by a missile, promptly killing the three men.

Why did the Japanese boy drop his sushi? He was hit by a tsunami

What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

What did one traffic light say to the other? Nothing, as traffic lights are incapable of thought as they are not living.

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

whats the stage after cancer? you die

Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

Casey Anthony kills a baby

What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

While your reading this. A man is robbing your home and sodomizing your dog

What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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