what happens when chuck norris does a push up. he pushes himself up

What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because blind people aren't allowed to drive in the United States.

Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

sorry son your nanas been put down

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

How do the Chinese name their children? They decide on a name that both parents can agree upon, and they write that on the certificate of birth.

Vancouver Canucks Hater: What time is? Another Vancouver Canucks Hater: 6 past Luongo

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Can I have... ...a beer." The bartender asks, "What's with the large pause?" To which the bear replies, "I have... ...a speech impediment."

Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

Why did the girl fall off her bike? I threw a ball at her.

-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

There once was a boy walking down the street. He got shot in the head. He died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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