Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

thumb_up thumb_down -6

fish fishy caoimhin

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the homeless man say to the man who gave him change? “Mmmm I sure do love pocket lint”

thumb_up thumb_down -6

To be, or not to be. That is not the question. The question is, what time is it?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q:Why did the boy drop his icecream? A: His arm was chopped off by a ninja

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So a person asked a blonde in America which was closer: the Moon or Canada? The blonde responded "Canada"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red violets are blue or at least that's what they tell me because I am blind

thumb_up thumb_down -6

identical jokes get different votes.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

thumb_up thumb_down -6

"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes it is, how may I help you?"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you get a single-armed monkey down from a tree? Wave.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock F*ck of I'm watching p0rn

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Mr. Pazdzioch and Mr. Hahn and Mr. Fishers big ass do for fun? Ate Mr. Kilgores shit at shin-go-beek jamboree.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops