Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" The grasshopper doesn't respond because he is a grasshopper and therefore can't talk.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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A Penn State administrator walks in to a butt.

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what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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What's funnier than diarrhoea? Cancer What's funnier than cancer? The holocaust

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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A duck walks into a restraunt and sit's down at it's table. The waiter asks what the duck would like to eat. The duck says "I'd like a tasty, healthy meal that will help me lose weight." The waiter says "How about the rocket salad?" So, the duck orders a rocket salad, eat's it, pays his bill, and leaves.

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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A little boy walks up to his father and asks him a question, "Daddy, how are babies born?" His father then replies in an enthusiastic manner, "You see, I stuck my dick in your mom's vag and started pounding. Apparently two condoms defeat the purpose."

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How many jews does it take to- I have alzheimers

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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What's brown and sticky? Some brown pigment mixed with something sticky like glue.

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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Why didn't the kid get a bike for Christmas? Because his parents died and Santa's not real

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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