What's better than a gold brick? 2 gold bricks.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Whats the difference between Tina Turner and dead babies? I have never fu*ked Tina Turner before.

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how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY SO I CALL HER by her real name because she is a woman and worthy of my respect.

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What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

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How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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What's worse than rain on your wedding day? You scheduling your wedding to be held on an aircraft carrier on december 7th 1941.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

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what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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Whats the difference between a lamp and Morgan Freeman? Alot

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How many people does it take to light a fag? I love BBW porn!!!!

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yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

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What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

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What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

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Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

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why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops