How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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A lysdexic man trys to rite a joek... the people who tried reading it got confused and offered help in rewriting it.

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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what did your mom say when she did crack? i am so f***ed up its not even funny, i mean, i literally screwed the racoon in our back yard. i certainly remember a lot of drugs and alcohol. i am pretty sure i raped your friend, billy. I also went all lezbo on your girlfriend. i murdered your brother. he was telling me to stop, so i lit him on fire and made him eat cigarettes. the very abusive mother was then charged with murder, rape, possesion of illegal drugs, assault and several other charges involving that one crazy night. refrigerator.

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What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

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(Insert joke here)

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What does a homeless man get for Valentines Day? Divorce papers

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Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

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Why did the football coach go to the bank Answer - to get his quarter back

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why did the chicken cross the road? to commit suicide.

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knock, knock whos there child molestor

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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There's a black guy in a house. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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How do you make a japanese man horny? Mutilate his girlfriend

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Why did the skeleton cross the street. He didn't.

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Its true, he didnt write that!!

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Is it hungry in here? Or is it just me?

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Have you heard about the angry chef? He beat his children

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Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

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Man 1: What's the difference between an elephant and a mailbox? Man 2: I don't know. Man 1: You'd make a terrible postman

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What's bloody and has wheels? The Holocaust I lied about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops