Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why does the deer cross the road? It had just birthed two deer, one of which was hungry, and food was on the other side, the other had been hit by 4x4 Hemi V8 Supercharged F1-50.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is worse than a case of the flu? Finding a dead camel on the highway with a half eaten lollipop in its mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

VaginaBoob ^.^

thumb_up thumb_down +5

my egg roll

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Albino African Americans

thumb_up thumb_down +5

V I T A M I N C !

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did the african say when he got cancer? what? i don't know, he said it in african.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the elephant say to the clown? Swell, morning isn't it?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A: What is faster than a speeding bullet? B: Light

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did the african man have for breakfast? Ebola cereal.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops