You: What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? Person: A towel?! You: No, an aquaphilian woman drying off a car ;)

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What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

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Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

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why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

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Dumb

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

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Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

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My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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how do you kill a giraffe? shoot it

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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My name is Harry.

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being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because due to the crashing economy he feels the need tom travel far distanced for work and food to support his growing family, this causes him to take dangerous routes of travel through hazardous areas with fast moving automobiles that potential have the chance to kill or severely Maine the distressed chicken. Not only does he have to cross these roads twice a day he is also under the added pressure of many millions of people questions why he takes such chivalrous actions to save the his future descent and the steep decline in the population of chicken.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

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just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

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what do fish smoke? sea weed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops