A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? BECAUSE HE WAS DEAD.

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

you gay?

Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

THERE'S THE IDENTITY THIEF GET HIM!

What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

What's red and blue and goes 105 MPH? A red and blue car.

So I was sitting in traffic the other day... And I got run over.

Whats brown and smells bad poo

010010101210001010 You dirty girl

Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

How many Mexicans can you fit in a Smart car? None. It's too damn small!

Why was the black man sad? Because his wife and children had been killed in a freak car accident while he had been driving.

Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

A guy walks into a restaurant.... He ordered his meal , got desert and left a nice tip based off a percentage of his final bill.

How did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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