Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

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Oh you expected a funny joke? Oh well

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the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

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Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

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A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

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What do you call 47 black people dead at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible hate crime

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

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Argon walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "Get the hell out!" Argon doesn't react.

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3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

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HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

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how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

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A man walks into the doctor's office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's genitals to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

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Bro my d*ck is like 20 inches. That's not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you

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What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend? I have AIDS.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange

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Roses are Red, I have a phone, Nobody texts me, Forever alone.

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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