Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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What do you call a magic MAAAAAAAAAAAN? A magic man

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Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

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Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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Q: What cat walks on two feet? A: Garfield Q: What mouse walks on two feet? A: Mickey Mouse Q: What duck walks on two feet? A: Donald Duck? A: No, all ducks you dipshit.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

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In Soviet Russia life had both pros and cons.

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Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

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What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

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Knock knock whos there? I have no anus

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selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

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Mel Gibson and a Jew walk into a bar They proceed to have a pleasant conversation and both take taxis home

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How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

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Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

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i like my babies how i like my potatoes..... skinned

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A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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Roses are red, violets are red, Tulips are red, bushes are red.... WTF MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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