Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

Obama getting elected in 2012.

Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

Whats worse than breaking your Xbox? Being raped by your dad.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

What is the best way to kill Kony? Shoot him in the head.

Haiku's are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

A child walked into the bar. He was promptly asked to leave because he was too young.

What's white and sticky? A marshmellow.

A man walks into the kitchen tells the woman to make him a sandwich and walks out.

What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? I eat pizza.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Holocast ...

Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

Why did the Arab bomb the US? Because it was his job.

Nobody walks into a bar. So nothing happens.

How did the blind man end up in the hospital? He didnt see the bus coming.

Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

roses are black violets are black I'm blind i need a dog.

Q:what has 6 legs and rides a unicycle! A: nothing!!! Duh!

Why do they call it "Unsweetened Tea?" Did they put sugar in it and then take it back out again?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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