Why was the turkey killed? Because this particular turkey lived on a farm and a supermarket was paying the farmer a reasonable price to sell it.

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Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

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Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Why do you never want to party with Lindsay Lohan? Because she's a drug abuser and a terrible influence.

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My therapist says that I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that!

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Why did the hooker fall out of the tree? Because she was dead

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

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An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

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Tilt your screen back

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women sports....

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Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

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Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on the training and hence productivity of the babies.

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Legolas They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard!

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

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What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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