A man with a magic watch says to a prostitute, "My magic watch says you are wearing any underwear." "YOU HAVE MAGIC WATCH?! Can it tell time too??!!!"

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me!! .... me who? Just open the motherf***ing door!! MOM!?! Theres a rapist at the door. MOM: No Jimmy, thats your father

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roses are red so is ur face dont look at me like im a crazy bitch

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Why did the police arrest the Escalade full of black men? Reckless driving. I lied, it was an asian woman.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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What's red and hurts your teeth. Answer: a brick

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Knock Knock. Who's there? You Know. You Know who?.......GOODBYE!

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what do you call a small midget? a smidget.

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please thumbs this up to help rhinos with boners thank you

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Want to hear a funny joke Rojo Bunchie

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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Whats eight feet tall, purple, smooth, delicious, uses proper grammar, and likes dolphins. I don't know.

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Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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Three black men get out of a taxy. They split the bill evenly and get on with their day... By Wade

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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