CISSY: TIMMY! COME AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK THIS INSTANT TIM: ....................../´¯/) ....................,/¯../ .................../..../ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( ..............\.............\... *CISSY SMACKS TIMMY AND SENDS HIM TO HIS ROOM WITHOUT DINNER.

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A.act like u see a banner and say hey do you see that banner over there? B.no what are u talking about A.oh well there's a banner over there

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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Me "knock knock" Tramp "who's there" Me "nobody you havent got a door"

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Why did the two blonds go to the bar together? Because they were carpooling to save money and help save the earths ozone layer that seals in all of our oxygen. They were also meeting some friends.

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OMG SOHPIE IS SOOOOO GREAT AT BLOWING Josh Brown xoxo

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what do you call a black man in a police car? either officer or offender, depending on what role he has in the crime.

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Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: *BANG!*

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When is a clown happy? At a child's birthday party.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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Why did the young boy drop his ice cream? Subscribe to find out; starting at only $14.99 a month! For more jokes similar to this one, subscribe to "Horrible Jokes" for $95 a month! Subscription Plans: - $14.99: Answer one joke per month - $49.99: The above plan... PLUS a free copy of "Antijoke, the book" - $99.99: A free cookie - $1099.99: A free cookie and a pass to the dark side - $0.25: Eternal happiness Order now for best prices! Or else we'll burn down your house and kill your extended family! Thank you!

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What did the boy with asthma say to his friend I can't breath

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What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

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A: Knock Knock! B: RING THE DOORBELL YA DUMMY

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Your moms so fat, she needed repruductive surgury.

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what do trees like to drink? r o o t b e a r

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Q:Where was The Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom

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What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

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What's the difference between a black minister and a white priest? Nothing. We are all equal in the eyes of God.

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What's purple and glows? An electric grape

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Q: why was the women out of the kitchen? A: Probably to partake in one of her many hobbies.

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What's worse than getting in a car accident? Being turned into dust and swarmed by bees while on fire

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Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

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Q: you wanna hear a joke? A: yeah sure. Q: well im not gnna.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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