What goes in dry, comes out wet and pleases two people. A teabag, you pervert.

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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Guess what? I like trains.

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nipple

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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A man shouts a women crossing the road "Oi, get your rat out love!" So she did, and it savaged his face.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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what kind of person would you call dumb the ones who read anti jokes

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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What's worse than slipping on a bannana peel? The Gestapo. Go to Aushwitz now.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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