How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

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Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

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where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

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What did the apple say to the banana. Nothing fruits cant talk.

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Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Why did the wee boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a truck.

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Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

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Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

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A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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i died. new product by steve jobs

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash and the other one is a watermelon.

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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