What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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So I'm at the office and I tell this guy, "Hey can you pass me the stapler. But when you pass it over, make sure there are staples in it 'cause if not, I can't staple anything."

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Do you know how to forget? No. Me either, I forgot.

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Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

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Why did the american block the road? Because he just ate at Mc donalds.

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If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

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Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

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How did the jew win a marathon? Through hard vigorous training by running everyday and eating healthy.

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Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

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What do you do when life gives you Oranges? You make lemonade and life wonders how you did it

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Jebron Lames.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Bob Hi bob, come inside. And next time just use the doorbell

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Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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What do you call a black woman who had 4 abortions? A Crimestopper

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Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

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Rick Santorum 2012

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Whats better than Anti-jokes? Mtiscape.com

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

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Q: why did the train not make it to the station? A: it crashed and killed everybody on board.

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kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

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What's better than winning the Paralympics? Having legs.

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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