Who should you call when your dad overdoses on Viagra. Child Support

what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I want to get you pregnant.

Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

Gustavo Andrade

A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

What's funnier than a Laffy Taffy joke? Almost anything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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