What did one cat say to the other cat? Meow. What did one dog say to the other dog? Meow. Why was the man sad? He had a retarded dog.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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Q: What did the Rapist say to the Little girl before they got in to the Van? A: Get In the Van

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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The banana, the raspberry and the pear arrived to the party, then the carrot and the tomato arrived as well, but when the apple and the orange arrived the banana left... ...This where just getting to fruity...

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jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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My dad said that if I post anymore jokes on this website, the will hit my head against the keyboaaskdnaji;nsd;asdnasd;

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Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

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What do Jesus, The Easter Bunny, and Santa Claus all have in common? Their middle names are all Larry.

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How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

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How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

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What did Jesus say as he walked on water and people went like WOHOO! OMG WE ARE TOTALLY GOING TO CHISEL THIS INTO JEWTUBE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE! "BEHOLD AS I WALK UPON THIS WATER WHILE ALL OF YOU HAVE FAILED BEFORE ME! ONLY I CAN WALK OF THIS WATER OF FROZEN WITHOUT SLIPPING! Nero: Because go fuck yourself asshole. Lol... Jewtube was not as widely available as youtube so yeah... Walking on ice without falling over was a big thing back then... You know such as OMG! EATING BREAD AND DRINKING WINE! WOOOOOOAAAAH SCIENCE! AND BURNING BUSHES SPOKE AND... Moral: "Ill be back, you know, just to annoy you, and because I want to, a real man needs no other reason, and that is why you fuckers need so many of them"

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Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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Why did the black man smell really bad? A: becuase he ran out of paper

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A Jew, an atheist, and an Asian man walk into a bar. They all have a drink and then go home to their families

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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