Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Because he was bringing food to support his wife and 3 kids whom were very hungry and needed it to survive.

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why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

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Bumsniffer

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Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

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In Soviet Russia..... the exact same thing happens, stupid.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hello??? .....

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Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

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why did the boy fall off his bicycle? because his dad threw a refrigerator at him.

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Knock knock Who's there No one. The house has been vacant for years.

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What would you find if you shaved chuck norris's beard? A chin.

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Soo if ur on a jet ski and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? Pickle.

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knock knock who's ther? chris chris who? JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR AND CHECK IT OUT

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Rick Santorum 2012

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Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

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What is the difference between a bike and a baby? There are a lot of differences

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman

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This is a haiku Haikus are not really jokes Congratulations!

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why are you reading this? You are bored out of your mind and don't want to do you're homework. and now that you read this, you will realize what you're doing and will now get back to work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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