A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Jehovah's Witness." "Jehovah's witness, who?" "Just Jehovah's Witness. Your doorbell is not working."

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"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

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When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

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Q: Why was the prostitute's mouth sore? A: She had multiple cavities due to poor dental hygiene.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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Yeah, me too. The car just ran straight through the stoplight and it was all over...

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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What is blue and on the bottom of the pool. A drowned baby

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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What do you call a black man called Jermaine? Jermaine!

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Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

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What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

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Cum on guys, gay jokes arent funny!

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Hey guys I'm more of a Nets fan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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