What do you call a black man riding a plane? A black man riding a plane.

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how do u get to your favorite chinese restaurant? wok.

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

whats fat and ugly ? aidan slattery

what happens when you piss on a dead monkey nothing you just lose the urge to pee O.o

Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

A cowboy rides into town and stays the weekend but then leaves on Wednesday, how is this possible? He was alive for the weekend and died on Sunday, his body left on Wednesday. Now get a job and be happy with your life.

What do a purple grape and an elephant have in common? They are both purple, except for the elephant.

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

Why did the frog die? He had AIDS

There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

knock knock Get off my porch I've already called the police.

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

People...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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