How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

What do you call two black guys holding up a store? Really strong.

- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

What was Hellen Keller's dogs name? dhfgbvskjne How did Hellen Keller's dog die? Natural causes.

What did the jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing.

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

What did death say to life? Go die

MOOOOOOOOOOO

How do you give an 80 year old man a heart attack? Hold a gun to his head

What do you call this? A sentence in English.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? .....Neither have they.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. "Where's my tractor?"

What's the difference between two telephone poles? T-shirts! Because motorcycles don't have doors!

What has eight wheels and cost more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

Why was everyone screaming bloody murder? Their home team won

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

black people are white when i use night gogles

Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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