What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

Why does the man ignore his wife? Because he is dead.

Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

why did the mokey fall out of the tree because it was dead.

Nickelback

Female rights.

What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

What do you call a man named Cornelius? Well, he prefers to go by his middle name, Eric, because he was teased as a child for being named Cornelius.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

once you go black your credit goes wack

Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? Because recently she has been missing payments on the elictric bill because of economic hardships.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Being raped with a cheese grater.

What did the blind, deaf and dumb lady name her kid? Sebastion.

why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

Try this on your friend Have him start with "knock knock" Then blankly stare at him, if he asks you To reply tell him no one is home

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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