Q: If Elvis was alive today, what would he crave the most? A: Brains. Moral: BRAAAAAAAAAAAINS!

what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

why did the car crash? Because the driver was just a box of raisen Brand

Q: Why is 8 afraid of 9? A:Because 9 killed 8's family

There was a lil girl in a red hoody skipping to her grandma's house. When she got there she noticed her grandma wasn't home. The lil girl panics and see's a wolf. She hesitates and asks the wolf "Have you seen my grandma" The wolf replies with a yes, shes in the backyard planting flowers.

Q. How do you blindfold a Chinese man? A. With a blindfold.

why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

What do silly people in a monastery say? stop munkying around.

A man walks into a bar, gets caught in a knife fight, and dies horribly. The funeral was closed casket.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Why was the teen boy shirtless? He was mauled by tigers.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

Hey babies The holocaust called, they want their screams back.

An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Worlds first anti joke.

roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

a man walks into a bar and it hurts

Why did the little boy leave his bike on the side of the road? He was kidnapped and his body was found 2 weeks later at Penn State

A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

why didn't the boy get any presents for his birthday? because when his dad went to the store to get him some presents he ended up buying presents for himself like a huge douchebag.... and the apple doesn't fall from the tree so his son is a douchebag too and doesn't deserve presents.

What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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