ATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapos.

Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

A black man orders a pizza to be delivered to his house. He is delightfully pleased at the speed in which the pizza was delivered and decided he would order from that pizza shop again in the near future.

What do you call an indian driving a plane? A pilot.

What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

you know what they say, Big man, Big hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, shame he died

10+10=20. 20+20=40 40-10=30 I have 2 penises.

roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

Wigan.

Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

Chuck Norris goes to the mars to fight the marshuns he then die's soon after because there is lack of oxegen on mars and theres no marshuns.

There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

What's brown and sticky? A Stick

Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall Humpty dumpty ha a great fall Hunpty dumpty's skull was split in two

One man said to another, "Hey, can you hear that?" "No." He replied.

Rose are red, violets are blue, niggas is soft, just like you

What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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