A small plane is flying across the Atlantic Ocean, on board there's a Black Guy, a Jew, a Priest, and a Mexican. The plane has engine failure and needs to crash, but luckily there are enough parachutes for everyone. The evacuation is succesful.

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A: What's worse than two dead babies lying on cement? B: The Holocaust? A: Yeah or something like that

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Yo mamma is so weird most people try to avoid her.

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What did the man say to the woman? get back in the kitchen and make me a sandwich.

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Two elephants walk off of cliff.... BOOM BOOM!

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Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

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The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

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Why is it that we don't eat clowns? Because in most Western countries cannibalism is illegal.

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What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Oama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

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What did the chicken say after crossing the road? Nothing.It's a f*cking chicken.

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How do you get a clown off a swing set? You throw an axe at his head when he's not looking.

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What did the fan of Justin Beiber say? Nothing there are no fans.

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What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

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A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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hi my name is matt mckeon and i like renata saggy tits !!!!!

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops