A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

Wanna hear something funny? David is addicted to mw3 like the other 3 million people!

What do you get when you cross a jack-o-lantern and an antelope? Nothing. You wouldn't see an antelope by a pumpkin.

what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

A Black Man Walks Into A Club.

Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

Whats worse than 2 holocausts? 2 and one tenth of a holocaust

Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

A blonde girl walks into a car.

What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

A guy walks into a bar Many people gather around him to see if he is alright and to tell him he needs to watch where he is going.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

what's silver and red and keeps crashing into the walls? a baby with forks in its eyes

Knock Knock Who's there? Your real father. I left you when you were a month old and I have regretted the decision ever since. I would like to be a part of your life.

Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I am a dog

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

Q: What did the peanut say to the shell? A: Its dark in here.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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