'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Suzie was in a traumatizing accident resulting in her arms getting cut off. Knock Knock? Whos There? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

yo mamas so fat she weighs a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did justin fuck alice and maliyah to have fun

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

if quiz is quizzal whats test?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call Michael? A homosexual person who is nice, however he is still gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Aodhan peanut head Hearty

thumb_up thumb_down +16

your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

7

thumb_up thumb_down +16

(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going off a cliff? A Caddy fits five.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the same between a school bus and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the monkey fall out the tree, He was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops