John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Michael Jackson!

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Tunechi

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A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

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1 + 1 = 3

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How do you stop a baby alien from crying? Watch what its mother does to soothe it and then try and copy that.

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Aaaaakkkkkiiiiiinnnnfffffeeeeennnnnwwwwaaaa

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how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

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whats two naked people in a bed? too much information

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Q:A man walked into a bar. He looked at everyone and suddenly started crying. Why? A: Because everyone was drunk, and therefore came to the point where no one could remember him or anyone else.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

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Why'd the girl fall of her scooter? She fell into a hole and died. She was never found again. All that was left was her scooter.

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

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A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

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Is this the krusty krab? NO! THIS IS red lobster, how many i help you?

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A baptist priest walks into a bar with a boner.

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I walked into an elevator with Ray Rice...

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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I hate it when I press submit, and I forgot to finish the jo

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Q: What do you call a Deer with no eyes? A: No ideer. Q; What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no ideer.

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Wanna here a joke? Canadians.

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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