Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your family is dead, I killed them.

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Your Mom.

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Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

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Why can't T-rex give hih fives, Because they're dead...

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Why was the alcoholic unable to pass a stool when he sat down on the toilet? Because he did it on the floor.

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womens rights

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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An Atheist and a Christian are walking along a sidewalk going in opposite directions when suddenly the Atheist sneezes. The Christian says "God Bless You!" Even though the Atheist doesn't believe in God he understand that the gesture was a kind one and so he nods and politely says "Thank you!" before going on about his day.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

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Why is Tom Garrick gay Answer- Because he is

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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Helen Keller went to town riding on a pony she stuck a feather in her hat and called it uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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Two generals went for a trip, it went very well in general.

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Why did the man feel so guilty after having sex...... He found out He was a tranny

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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A man is approached by a mysterious character in the streets, offering to tell him a dark and amazing tale. The man declines and walks away.

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Woman: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting Doctor Woman: Interupt- Doctor: You have cancer

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Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

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What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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I think people who go to see a psychiatrist need their head examining.

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How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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