2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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