What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

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Two friends are sitting on a couch watching TV. One friend accidently turned on a pornography channel. The other friend felt awkward and went home.

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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Donald Trump

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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