Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

You are joking right?

One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

12/23/2012

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

What do you call a muslim with a gun I dont know his name

why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

How many people does it take to paint an elementary school red? 27.

Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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