Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Why couldn't the gay man grow a beard? He shaved his face frequently.

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What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

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I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops